Well, I’ve done it. I’ve finally cracked the German language. It turns out it’s not as difficult as everyone makes out either.
It will come as a surprise to absolutely no one that Germans really love pork – in fact, they eat approximately 0.15kg of pork a day. Therefore, I guess it shouldn’t really come as a surprise that so many porky expressions permeate the language.
So now, instead of spending years trying to learn the vagaries of the German language, I’ve decided to communicate mainly through the use of piggy expressions.
Here are my top eight pig-related German expressions (or, to be more correct, the only eight I know).
8. Alles hat ein Ende, nur die Wurst hat zwei
Everything has an end, only the sausage has two. Pretty self-explanatory and quite profound in a porky sort of way.
7. Unter aller Sau
The literal translation of this one would be “under all pig (or sow)”, which doesn’t really make much sense to the average English speaker. However, when you imagine what usually lies under all pigs, then it starts to become a little clearer. I guess you could translate it as “everything is in total shit or chaos” – something Germans do not like.
6. Ich habe die Schnauze voll
I believe the original version of this one was “Ich habe die Nase voll” but, naturally, the Germans had to porkify it. And so, “I have the full nose” became “I have the full snout”, which does not mean that your nose is blocked. No, it means that you’ve had enough of something.
5. Eierlegendewollmilchsau
Ah, one of those brilliant German compound nouns, but what on earth does it mean? Translating it doesn’t provide much help either – an egg-laying wool milk sow.
???
I can’t even think of an English equivalent for this one but the basic idea is that you’ve got one animal that can lay eggs, grow wool, produce milk, and even give you bacon and sausages. So, for example, if someone is asking you to do more work than you can cope with, you could yell, “For God’s sake! I’m not an egg-laying wool milk sow! There’s only so much I can do!” At least I think that’s how you could use it…
4. Ich glaube, mein Schwein pfeift
Literally, “I think my pig is whistling.” Obviously, pigs don’t normally whistle, not even German pigs, so this one expresses great surprise.
3. Der Kummerspeck
Grief bacon. Initially a bit of an oxymoron to me as bacon induces anything but grief in me. More accurately, it’s the excess weight that you gain from comfort eating in times of heartache. (Snigger.)
2. Es ist mir Wurst
If you translate it word for word, it means “It is to me total sausage”, or to put it into words that people can understand, it means “I don’t care about this at all”.
And my absolute, all-time favourite:
1. Jetzt geht es um die Wurst
Or “Now it gets about the sausage”, which means “Now it’s time to get serious” or “It’s now or never”. As I’ve mentioned before, Germans take their sausages very seriously so if a German says this to you, you might want to start running.
So, you’ve seen my top eight porky German idioms, but maybe you’re struggling to see how I could get by communicating through porky idioms alone. Well, for example, imagine that I’m breaking up with my imaginary German boyfriend. This is how that conversation could go:
Me: I have a full snout. It’s over.
Dagobert: But why? We’re so good together, baby!
Me: Everything has an end. Only the sausage has two.
Dagobert: But I don’t want this to end!
Me: Huh. Our relationship is under all pig. I think you know that.
Dagobert: But I thought everything was perfect!
Me: You expect too much. I’m not an egg-laying wool milk sow, you know.
Dagobert: I think my pig is whistling. I wasn’t expecting this.
Me: It’s all sausage to me.
Dagobert: But why now??
Me: Now it gets about the sausage.
Dagobert: But, but…
Me: Oh, just leave me in peace. I need to get my grief bacon on.
Hopefully it’s now clear how my new approach to German language-learning will work. Or maybe I’m just throwing my pearls before swine?
The image of the egg-laying wool milk sow was taken from here.
It’s an interesting premise to learn a language based on phrases about a topic. I’m trying to learn German by starting with basic phrases, but I’ll try this 🙂
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I was told last night that there is an end to the sausage – when you eat it 😉 Good luck with your studies! 🙂
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That conversation at the end made my day 😀
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Now I just need to find a German boyfriend to dump 😉
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God! I hear a lot of this on the train of a morning. My favourite? “Ich habe die Schnauze voll….” I don’t use it myself, I just give people the teacher’s look. That works wonders…..
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I’m using all of them now 🙂 Like a real Berliner haha! 🙂
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Don’t forget:
You shouldn’t drink alone – Nur ein Schwein trinkt allein (a sentiment I don’t share)
Nobody was there – Kein Schwein war da
Pigs are truly multipurpose.
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I’m a big fan of drinking alone – or with people. It’s all sausage to me 😉 Ha, at kein Schwein war da 🙂 I love German! Thanks for commenting! Linda
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Utterly Brilliant! All I can say is, you are a genius!!!! An egg-laying wool milk genius!
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Ha ha! You should do one on interesting Sicilian phrases – what’s the key word there?? It’s all pasta to me 😉
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Your posts always leave me with a big grin… or as happy as a pig in shit, so to speak. My bro in law says ‘it’s sausage to me’ in French – “ça m’est saucisse” – because he lived in Dusseldorf for years. He has also adopted the great “…oder?” that they still on the end of affirmative sentences to cast doubt on them.
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Ha, I do that in English! I always did so I should fit right in 🙂
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I’m giving you a hoch fünf Wurst. 🙂
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That’s the best kind of Wurst! 🙂
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Everything about this is good! I love that grief bacon expression and may just use the phrase in English anyway.
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Think I’ll have some hangoverbacon now. Incidentally, the word for hangover and a male cat are the same in German 🙂
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Elvis is so cute!
This post made me think of how in Arabic there are a thousand words for “camel” and how the natives of northern Siberia and Alaska have a thousand words for “snow.” Or something. I love Germans and their pig metaphors. Everything is always better with some pork!
Btw, I thought you might enjoy this: http://www.themigrantexpats.com/stressful-activities-life-in-germany/
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Elvis is a total diva now 🙂 He knows he’s famous! That link was really funny as well! I think I’ve just about managed to nail loading my shopping bags at the warp speed they beep items through at. It takes a lot of practice!
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How?! I still can’t pack my shopping bags quickly enough!
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Hand-eye coordination 😉 And sweat – a lot of sweat 😉
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cmon its still a lot better then stand there and wait untill the british cashier beeps your stuff through and then packs it for you takes AGES: I prefer the german way even though I do feel guilty if I havent put everything in time and the cashier looks at me sternly.
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Yeah, the first few times I was in shock! That was when I was staying in the ‘sex-swing’ flat and shopping at the local Penny. Now I think I’ve got the hang of it. I even tut at the person in front of me if they don’t get out of the way fast enough 😉
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Unfortunately, I was drinking coffee while reading this. Snork. 🙂
And, “porkify” — you created a new word! Very descriptive. It gets my vote to be added to the dictionary referenced above. In fact, all your phrases, and especially your translated use of them in sentences, get my vote to be added to Urban Dictionary!
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Porkify 🙂 Yes, I do like it very much! And I’ve been using these expressions in English a lot lately 🙂
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Lucky, lucky you for being such a darn good blogger! I’ve just awarded you a Real neat Blog Award.
I know you’re a busy lass, so please don’t feel obliged to play the game, and answer the questions. (I don’t carry grudges, I just get even.)
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Thank you so much! Much appreciated! But you’re right, I probably won’t play the game 😉 Off to Leipzig today 🙂
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Good on ya, I always want to dodge these networking thingo’s. Have a good time in Leipzig.
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Thank you! Was supposed to go yesterday but then Friday night happened 😉
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Party animal! There’s probably a German pig saying for that, I suppose.
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There is, of course 😉 Sau rauslassen – to unleash the pig, or to behave badly in other words 🙂
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I love your conversation example, hilarious!
By the way, my German husband says you forgot one important expression: Schwein gehabt 🙂
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Yeah, my flatmates reminded me of that one too! 🙂 To have pig – makes no sense at all haha! I JUST WON THE LOTTERY! I HAVE PIG! HURRAH! 🙂
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Ein bier.
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Prost!
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Well, you certainly didn’t make a pig’s ear out of this post 😉 Very funny, the Eierlegendewollmilchsau is hilarious, I’m racking my brains trying to think of an English equivalent but I can’t even come close!
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Me neither! ‘Jack of all trades’ and ‘I only have two hands’ don’t come nearly close enough! And the German version can be used about things as well so I’m at a loss!
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Hilarious as always
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Maybe you can use some of them in the cheaters in your races 😉 Screaming at people in angry German is usually quite effective 😉
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You. Are. Brilliant. And I need to learn to say #5 for certain times at my workplace 😉
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Say it in German – it will sound scarier 😉 And thank you kindly 😉
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How can “sausage” mean both “something I don’t care about” and “something to get serious about”? I guess Wurst is an all-purpose word! Like in English, “That’s a worthless pile of shit” vs. “Say, that’s some good shit!”
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btw I do have a problem with english speakers constantly using the word shit on every occasion…. from “I dont give a shit” to “this shit is the bomb” etc. I feel like using hog or sausage references is a better option=)
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Ha, funny, another reader (Linnet) just made the same point! Well, from now on, this English speaker will be using sausage references – it will be the sausage 🙂
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I know she made the same point I was replying to her…. as far as I understand how this forum works….
btw if we speak about food what is your favourite type of sausage in Germany so far? I love knackwurst and riesencurrywurst (a huge curry wurst that has not been cut in pieces)
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Ha, oops, I was just up from my nap so didn’t notice who you were replying to as I was still a bit dopey 🙂 I love the Berliner Currywurst of course! And some of the Bavarian ones are nice – can’t remember what they’re called though. Think I’ll go for some Maultaschen later – I have a craving 🙂
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Maultaschen are Swabian! You need to come down this way for some good ones.
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Ha, I know! But I’ll make do with what I can get in Berlin for now! There’s a great Swabian restaurant around a 5-minute walk from where I live 🙂
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And much more entertaining!
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I guess it’s the same thing! Really, it makes no sense at all haha!
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How porkifly saucy of you!! 😉 Definitely one of your top German posts – imaginary boyfriend to break up with n all!
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And they say breaking up is hard to do – not in German. In German, it’s frickin’ hilarious 😉
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You’ve cracked it! It took me ages to work out that people were actually saying s’wurst with a shrug and not being funny.
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Well, they might be being funny – sometimes it’s hard to tell 😉 Nice to have you back! I was just thinking about you as I was writing that post as I needed to find the BBC documentary you posted for the pork statistic! 🙂
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Its all sausage to me is my favourite. and please let me tell you once again how bad english sausage is compared to german. and dont even get me started on american hot dogs. no.
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No to American hot dogs as well, but I am a bit partial to an English sausage! But I prefer Irish ones – natürlich 😉
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And I love Mr. Piggy at the computer. 🙂 Anyway….this post is VERY timely because just last night I was watching the Muppet Movie and Miss Piggy is still fabulous!
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She’s a total diva – as is Elvis now 😉 He tried to push my flatmate out of the bed last night cos he’s famous now 😉
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I will be using the: “For God’s sake! I’m not an egg-laying wool milk sow! There’s only so much I can do!” quote next disagreement with hubby! LOVE IT!
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Do the Italians have any equivalent?
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bit off-topic: did you read those news yesterday? 😀 unbelievable! http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2921820/German-court-rules-men-right-stand-urinating-tenant-sued-sprinkling-bathroom-floor-no-news-s-OK-leave-toilet-seat-up.html
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I did! Hilarious! The dreaded Sitzpinkel 😉 Thanks for commenting! Linda.
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Here’s another one for you: Schwein haben. meaning to be lucky. Like if you drop a wine bottle but manage to catch it just before it hits the floor and smashes everywhere you can say “Phew, Schwein gehabt!” (That was lucky!”)
You can also ad sau to the beginning of lots of other words (everything? not sure) to mean very/extremely: saudumm, saublöd, sauschnell, sauteuer. I wouldn’t use any of those in formal conversation though. Oh, and Sauwetter is nasty weather.
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So many! Argh! I’ll definitely be using Sauwetter though!!
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another one for you – sau rauslassen (to let the pig out) means to pretty much do any nasty thing you wanna do (have sex get drunk etc) but in a negative way; like the british tourists often go to eastern europe to let the pig out – that kind of way
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oh and another one – versauen – to screw smth up
damn we do have a lot of pig idioms!
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That one will probably come in very handy after I ‘Sau rauslassen’ 🙂 And yes, yes you do!! I said that to a few Germans during the week while I was thinking about this post and they were like “Huh? Nah. Well, I never really thought about it. Hmm…” It’s all coming out now!
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Ha, my flatmate told me the ‘Sau rauslassen’ one last night – but she used me as an example 😉
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Grief bacon. Almost makes me yearn for a little heartache!
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It’s OK to have bacon anyway – I just did 🙂 No grief involved at all 🙂
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I may have to try and include ‘Das ist mir Wurst’into as many conversations as possible – though probably in the English translation! 🙂
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I’m definitely going to do the same! 🙂 So many great expressions, so little time 😉
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This is by far the best thing that’s happened to me all day. And now I want some sausage. Or bacon. Or both.
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Have both 😉 Glad to have brightened up your day! I kind of want to get a German boyfriend now, just to break up with him in German. He’d have to follow the script carefully though 😉
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*laughs* Great!
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Ha, are you as happy as a pig in shit? 😉
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*gigglesnort*
I love the translations! Especially the under pig one. I may adopt it into my english vernacular.
HAH!
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Yeah, I’m going to do the same – confuse the hell out of everyone when I go home by communicating only through German idioms in English 😉
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Yes. Exactly!
I already do this to an extent with Turkish. I am going to add German to the mix 😀
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They’re just too good to limit to Germany! 🙂
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so you brought Hoch fünf to Germany and now you re bringing sausage idioms to Ireland? yeah lets make Dirish!
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Ha ha! Dirish! Yes! 🙂
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Love it! But you left off my favorite… the noble innere Schweinehund, aka the best excuse for laziness in ze land. 🙂
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Your inner pigdog? 🙂
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Yes. The inner pigdog is what makes us all lazy. It was a very hot topic in class right after Christmas break. think I have at least three, haha.
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You’ve not come across this one, Linda? The expression goes “den inneren Schweinehund überwinden”. A daily chore… sigh.
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Ha, no I hadn’t heard it before! I guess I’m pretty in tune with my inner demon so I don’t really need a separate name for him 😉 My flatmate also told me ‘die Sau rauslassen’ which is what I do every weekend according to some 😉
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By far, one of your most brilliant posts to date. “Das ist mir wurst” has been my favorite German saying since I first heard it in 2010.
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I think this is my favourite post to date as well! It was so much fun to write – and it’s so much fun learning German! 🙂 There’s always a whistling pig in store! 🙂
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