It’s not the start of a bad joke but, rather, the beginning of an excellent Friday evening. You see, the Germans have regulated the hell out of most things but, thankfully, they haven’t got around to stopping foolish foreigners from trying to make very dangerous German drinks.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you, Feuerzangenbowle…
I had my first FeuerverylongGermanword at the Christmas market at Schloss Charlottenburg last week and, as with most things German, I instantly fell in love. I mean, it’s got wine, rum, sugar and FIRE – what’s not to like? So, when Young Germany posted a recipe, I just knew I had to try and make it myself.
Now the thing about making Feuerzangenbowle is that it’s rather dangerous, so the last thing you want to do is make it at your own apartment. Instead, you put the suggestion out there and wait for an innocent friend to invite you round to their place. This is where brave, wonderful Brahilde (Brazilian Hilde) stepped in. She invited Norhilde (Norwegian Hilde) and we were all set. A new Facebook chat group was born.
Me: OK, here’s the recipe. Brahilde, what have you got?
Brahilde: Um, I’ve got cups…
(Finally, a woman after my own heart.)
Me: OK, so we’ll split the ingredients and bring everything around to your place. Norhilde, I’m shit with things like spices so you can get those and the rum. I’ll get the wine, fruit and Zuckerhut (sugar loaf).
Norhilde: Done.
Me: Brahilde, do you have a big saucepan?
Brahilde: I have little saucepans…
Me: (for once feeling “kitchenly” superior) OK, I’ll bring a saucepan as well.
I popped over to the local supermarket, obviously located the wine easily, picked up a few oranges and lemons and went on the hunt for the Zuckerhut. Damn, where was the Zuckerhut? I found a jolly German lady who works there.
Me: Excuse me, do you have Zuckerhut?
Shophilde: Yes, I think we have it somewhere…
Me: (Babbling like a lunatic) You see, I’m going to try and make Feuerzangenbowle this evening but I think it’s going to be a bit dangerous.
Shophilde: For your head or just in general?
Me: Both.
Anyway, we found the Zuckerhut, I paid up and jauntily left the supermarket. I had very sensibly decided that three bottles of wine was probably too much so I told the Hildes that we’d only use two.
I crammed everything into two plastic bags and headed for the station. This time, I was almost hoping I’d get groped as I couldn’t wait to see the expression on the guy’s face when he got walloped with a massive saucepan and three bottles of wine. Luckily for Berlin’s gropers it didn’t happen.
I clanked my way through Neukölln and arrived at Brahilde’s apartment where everything was looking rather festive. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I thought it would be a shame to watch the place burn to the ground.
Norhilde showed up soon afterwards with the rest of the ingredients. She did admirably with the spices thanks to a lot of help from Google Translate. And the rum…
Tip: Do not let a Norwegian buy the rum for Feuerzangenbowle. You need the cheapest, nastiest, strongest rum you can find and a Norwegian will only buy the finest, most expensive, ridiculously non-flammable rum.
Tip: Choose a friend who owns a CORKSCREW.
After an emergency dash to the supermarket, I poured the two bottles of wine into the saucepan, added the crushed fruit and proceeded with merry abandon to throw in the spices I’d never heard of as well.
At this point, we realised that we didn’t have a sieve or tongs or anything that would be particularly useful (normal) to hold the sugar over the saucepan. Brahilde gamely suggested her cutlery-drying utensil and we were back in the game.
We placed the cutlery-drying thing upside-down in the pot and put the Zuckerhut on top of it.
I poured a shitload of rum on top of it and Norhilde lit a match.
Pfft.
The match went out.
I poured on some more rum. Norhilde lit a match.
Pfft.
The match went out.
Scheiße.
Thankfully, I’d had a message from my German friend earlier that day saying that if the rum wouldn’t light, heat it up and try again. We poured half the bottle into another (little) saucepan and warmed it up. I gently spooned some over the Zuckerhut and Norhilde lit another match. WHOOSH! WE HAD FIRE!
I continued to spoon and Norhilde continued to light matches and I only set the saucepan of rum on fire a couple of times. Soon, all of the Zuckerhut had dissolved into the saucepan and we were ready to taste it.
I’m not one to brag but I really think I have a talent for making Feuerzangenbowle. I’m not particularly gifted in the kitchen, but this, this was amazing.
And we all lived.
Fun night.
This definitely sounds like a drink I need to stay far, far away from. It sounds too good!
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Nah, you just need a bit of practice, that’s all 😉
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heh heh heh 🙂
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This sounds like a group of great people and a lot of fun! So glad you didn’t burn the apartment down. These are the kind of friends I am looking for in Köln!
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Ha, yeah, they’re really fun people! Unfortunately we’ve lost touch a bit as Brahilde moved to Munich. Still, never really stuck for a fun crowd in this city! Hope you find what you’re looking for too!
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Reblogged this on Expat Eye on Germany and commented:
For the season that’s in it…
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So, the individual ones at the markets are SO tame by comparison! This is just begging to set the house on fire!
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Luckily we didn’t, but just in case, stick with the friend’s flat idea 😉 And yes, this was the grand-daddy of that little one you had 😉 Will probably write the blog post a bit later…
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A great replacement for a traditional Christmas pudding with brandy – much more fun!
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Definitely! And not as fattening – probably 😉
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Lol, on our first attempt we some how managed to burn the sieve I thought was out of steel. And then there was an incident with a tea towel while I was out. But we lived too and the flat could be resented even after us… (i think we had another rum to drink while doing the preparations… maybe that was the reason….?)
Boy do I miss the taste though!!!
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Ha ha ha! It is damn tasty! That sounds like quite the adventure – I did think of using a sieve but Brahilde only had a plastic one and even I’m not that stupid 😉
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A dangerous drink on many levels! 🙂 Looks so much fun though.
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Funny! I had some of this recently–delicious, but dangerous. (I did some shopping after downing the Fire-bowl, and apparently my drunk self likes tacky 70’s decor.) I’m going to download that recipe and try it out on my unsuspecting relatives on Christmas–should be fun!
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Oh, drunk shopping is always a bad idea! I’m impressed you could still walk after it though, let alone shop 😉
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Rum with 37.5%? Maybe a cocktail based on rum. For flambéing I strongly advise “Stroh Rum 80%”! Furthermore, this stuff is basally for the famous Austrian Jagatee (hunters tea).
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That sounds more like it alright 😉
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Sounds epic! Well done.
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It truly was haha! A lot of fun 🙂
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I’m very glad you all lived.
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It was touch and go for a while, but me too 😉
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No risk, no fun! Looks like you had fun to me. I tried that once and burned my eyebrows off.
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I was a bit worried about my fringe in the beginning 😉
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The cutlery drying rack is genius!! It’s found its true kitchen purpose 🙂
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Ha! True! Drying cutlery is sooooo last season 😉
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Yep, you were right – I did enjoy that! I have to admire your ingenuity with the cutlery thingy. Can I ask what the spices were? I’m intrigued to know if they are genuinely complicated or just “Linda” complicated! I’m also fascinated by that big sugar lump – I’m off to Google that now. Glad it all worked out and you had a good night!
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Ha ha, the ingenuity was all Brahilde’s! I would have been holding it with two forks and ended up with no fringe 😉
These are the ingredients – like I said, I’m hopeless 😉
3 bottles of red wine (2-3 liters total)
2 cinnamon sticks
cardamom
allspice
1-2 oranges
1-2 lemons
5 cloves
1 German sugar loaf*
1 bottle of rum
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Sounds yum!
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It was delicious. You’re a bit of a goddess in the kitchen, you should give it a go! Blow Arunas’ mind 😉
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And the firemen didn’t have to come out…? Epic fail!
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I know. I was quite looking forward to meeting some hot German firemen 😦
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You can always try again… with the CHEAP rum 😉
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Yeah, I think it needs to be at least 42%. This was only 37.5. Norwegians. Sigh 😉
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OMG, and I thought you knew…. It`s basics physics: general rule of thumb < 50% it won't burn. But I digress. Next time, to include a german lesson, you guys oughta rent the movie, too. Incidentally, it`s called "Die Feuerzangenbowle"… Good old black and white movie.
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Ha, yes, I’ve heard of it! Found it while Googling Feuerzangenbowle! Must pop over to the local Video World and see if they have it. That and “Dinner for One” which I also haven’t seen!
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Oh, “Dinner for One” is shown on a local Australian TV station every year, on New Year’s Eve. It is absolutely wonderful. I hope you enjoy it.
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I’ve never seen it. Never even heard of it before I moved here but it’s huge in Germany!
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Dinner for one will be on German TV for new years, ..as usual, same as every year. Don’t bother renting it, it will come to you, all you have to do is stay awake long enough to see it. Greetings.
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P.S. There are several copies of it on Youtube if you must see it before New-year’s eve.
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OK, cool 🙂 I’ll check it out!
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Wonder where the fascination with it started. I’d never even heard of it!
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Der 90. Geburtstag, or Dinner for one was written in the 1920’s as a short stage play and recorded in 1963. Out of character for German television, it was never dubbed over in German, and returns every year. I have no idea why, it’s just the way it’s always been (from my perspective), same procedure as every year. Greetings.
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Trust you to think of firemen 🙂
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Just remember that I need to summon up all my mental energy to drag my thoughts away from cake… so firemen are quite an achievement!
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Whats your opinion about fire-women?
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That opinions don’t count for much when you’re on fire
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Well done you. And firemen aren’t as fattening 😉
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Who doesn’t think about firemen? 😉
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I don’t! Are there such things as firewomen?
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Wouldn’t know. I don’t spend much time thinking about them 😉
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Sure! Most of these formidable cow- tipping women come from former GDR- kolkhoz. Some of these are dismissed from the Bundeswehr because of supererogatory rudeness.
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I am now really confused, I started reading Linda’s post because it mentioned Brazilian and I thought she was going to ‘wax’ lyrical about hair cutting. But now we are discussing firemen and GDR women
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Heh heh, yeah, that kind of shit happens on this blog 😉 Scheiße, an opera singer has moved in next door – this is going to ruin nap time…
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So you are not doing an exposé on Brazilian waxing?
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I will if you will 😉
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Hi hi hi, A post on manscaping? What is the male equivalent to a Brazilian?
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Back, sack and crack 😉 For the craic 😉
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Artistsic edification fo free!
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Is waxing a special Anglo-Saxon or Americano thing? Like Halloween? And why is the Brazilian way so extra funny?
In Germany it’s a rather boring activity. You need a scrubber, a rag and wax. Or something more avant-garde product likes Emsal or Bembé. You don’t need to wax if you have fitted carpet, you must only hoover. And don’t waxing the tiles!
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Panta rhei.
From Brazilian waxing to Prussian waxing. From Rosinha to Rossweiße, from Oliviera to Ortlinde. 😉
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brasileiro?!
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Indeed.
Here I was hoping for some photos of Berlin’s finest firemen! Help us out, Linda!
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Yes, go on Linda! What’s a little arson between friends if it serves the Greater Good?!
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Ha ha! Thankfully I don’t need to burn anything down to use the internet 😉 Not necessarily German firemen but oh, wow…
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I’m so jealous!
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It was a ridiculous amount of fun 😉 Are you going to try to make it?
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No, I think not. I have a cat dependent on me staying relatively sane.
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He/she might really like it 😉
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That’s what I’m afraid of. I draw the line at sharing my booze with my cat. She gets the bread and water.
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Meanie 😉
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