I’ve just had one of the funniest lessons I’ve had in a long time. This was in no part due to my amazing skill as an English teacher, but rather due to the Germans’ amazing lack of skill when it came to something I think most six-year-olds have probably already mastered. (Not that I know anything about six-year-olds. Or want to.)
Anyway…
We were doing a lesson on comparatives and superlatives – you know: good, better, the best/bad, worse, the worst (or bad, badder, the baddest if you’re German and new to the language). The book wasn’t overly inspirational on this topic, so I thought I’d spice things up a bit by bringing in a game I’d found on the internet.
The game consists of a series of squares with one adjective in each. The students roll the dice and move their marker to the correct square. Once there, they have to flip a coin – if it’s heads, they have to make a comparative sentence; if it’s tails, they make a superlative sentence. Simple, right?
Bertha: Um, I don’t think I can do that.
Me: Do what?
Bertha: Flip a coin.
Me: What?
Bertilda: Can you show us again?
Me: What??
Betlinde: Yes, please show us again. I don’t think I’ve ever done that before.
Me: …
Slightly incredulous and wondering if they might be taking the piss (unlikely, given that they are German), I placed the coin on my forefinger, deftly flicked it with my thumb, neatly caught it and slapped it onto the back of my other hand. Triumphant, I looked around at the blank faces before me.
Bertilda: Can you do it one more time?
Me: Wowsers…
After another flawless demonstration, it seemed like we were ready to start. I passed the coin to Bertilda and we were off. She threw the dice, moved her marker, read out the adjective, picked up the coin and… regarded it dubiously.
Me: Go on! You can do it!
The flip was more of a flub – the coin hopped about a millimetre into the air before crash landing on the table with Bertilda snatching at it wildly.
Me: Bah hahahahaha! Oh my god! Sorry, yes, erm, heads. Make your sentence.
Sentence made, the coin worked its way around the table.
Me: Come on, Betlinde! Flip that coin!
*flip*
Me: Or you can just fling it at the table. That works, too.
I can best describe what Bertha did as fist pumping the coin into the air. She bungled the catch and the coin tumbled to the floor, rolling under the table. Ensuing “flips” saw the coin land everywhere in the room except for where it should have, including other people’s laps. I looked at the open window, wondering if I should close it before the battered coin made its getaway. I thought it might be a good idea to end the game before things got to that point but I was laughing too hard to speak.
Bertilda: My turn.
Me: Gurgle…
By now, she had developed this method of bouncing the coin between her hands as if it was burning her. Through my blur of tears of laughter, she seemed quite proud of herself.
Bertilda: “Interesting.” Umm. This English class is more interesting than my job.
Me: Aww, thank you! Wait, I don’t know how boring your job is. Maybe that’s not really a compliment.
Bertilda: Yes, my job is very boring.
Me: Harumph.
While the German gift for the coin flip was a flop, it seemed the German talent for ego-piercing directness was still alive and kicking.
This post jumped into my head just now along with it’s title and I instantly got the pun of the heading. Missed it completely the first time around.
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Ha ha! The penny dropped 🙂
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It’s been more than 1 month since your last post. Are you okay?
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Hi Roberto, yes I’m fine! Thanks for asking! I guess I’m in semi-retirement. Not quitting the blog but not fully active either. Confusing times 😉
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Your lessons sound like a lot of fun, with coin tossing etc, so maybe this won’t seem familiar at all, but have you read “Speak, Memory”, the memoir by Vladimir Nabokov?
As a child in Russia Nabokov was constantly hoping that his chronically-late English-language tutor wouldn’t turn up. Mr Burness was Scottish, and “crammed into the afternoon more private lessons than the day could well hold”, so as he criss-crossed the town on horseback he got later and later for each lesson.
And then as an adult Nabokov taught in Berlin (not sure what, Russian? English?) and hoped that some students wouldn’t show up for lessons. “in my furnished rooms in Berlin I awaited a certain stone-faced pupil who would ALWAYS turn up despite the obstacles I mentally piled in his way”.
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Ha ha! Yeah, I know the feeling! But my students at the moment are all lovely so the only reason I would wish that they wouldn’t show up is for an early finish for the day 🙂
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next time, see what you can get them to do by danging shiny keys!
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That might be too much for them! I’m not sure I could handle the excitement levels 😉 Did you see my pics of Montenegro on FB? You would LOVE it there!
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I didnt! I havent gone on FB in ages (I dont really use it – I’m really only on Instagram, and on Twitter for work). But heading there now!
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Told you it would be worth it 😉
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I always wondered about the part where we catch the coin in our palm, then slap it on the back of the other hand. I mean, what’s that all about? Why not just catch the coin?
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I guess it looks more dramatic this way! I’ve never thought about just catching it – I’m far too cool for that 😉
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Hahahaha!!! Coin flipping a flop??
PS… details to come but you heard it here first… I’m taking the plunge to join a ‘real’ job… with a German company… in India… with Germans coming to India… who have never been to India let alone worked here… Help!!! Will need every insight possible to survive – oops I mean be successful!! And help them survive!!! 🙂
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Oooh, how exciting! Feel free to ask me anything! I’m sure Simone will help too – and she’s an actual German, not a pretend one like me 😉
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Yeah!! I will definitely need a ‘crash course’ on working for a German company for sure!!
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Ha! They’re not as scary as they make out 😉 I wouldn’t start with a load of small talk though – or a coin flipping demo 😉
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Given that I’m roughly a quarter German, I can say with pride that I couldn’t flip a coin to save my life 🙂 No, seriously, I can’t flip a coin. Tried it. Failed. Now, I’m also part Irish so …. oh, well 😉
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Ha ha! I think your German side is winning out there! 🙂
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Hahaha I love this. I don’t know that I’ve ever thought about a coin flip being difficult! Maybe you can go pro!
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Maybe I should! Can’t say I’ve ever thought of it as much of a talent before either but live and learn 😉
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My theory on this is… Germans don’t like to leave anything to chance. They want to know the options, the pros and cons, and weigh them up until a winner emerges. They want the right choice to be determined by REASONING, not the random landings of chips of metal being flung through the air. They’d perform equally poorly at Russian roulette 😉
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Ha ha! Yes, I like this theory! Maybe I’ll bring a gun into the next lesson and test this out 😉
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😂😂😂 How difficult is it to flip a coin even if you haven’t done it before?
What’s pig Latin? I learned a big of real Latin at school but I’ve never heard of pig Latin… yes, I’m a Brit. 😏
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Clearly you’d be surprised at how difficult it is – and my demonstrations were fantastic, as you can imagine 😉
Have to say I had to Google pig latin too! Mystery solved – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pig_Latin – guess I have seen kids do it in American movies/TV shows now that I think about it. Just never realised it had a name!
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Ah ha! Now I understand. I think it had another name when I was growing up in England but I don’t remember what. I was never any good at it, I remember that 😉
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Yeah, same! I think we just switched the first letter to the end of the word but I can’t really remember. Loooooooooooooooooong time ago 😉
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Yes, the first consonant was moved to back and “ay” added on. So “table” would become “abletay”. I think we called it backslang.
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Ah yes, I remember that now! Simpler than the American version, I think!
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Cross-cultural insanity. I love it. I just discovered (or I think I have) that the British don’t learn pig Latin as kids. In fact, it’s so foreign to them that the last person I asked told me her school didn’t teach Latin. Neither did mine–and I’m still grateful for that. It’s a kids’ made-up language that–well, I was going to say every American kid learns but as soon as you say something like that it turns out not to be true. A lot of American kids learn.
But we do flip coins. In my case, badly, but I’ve never had to close the windows while I do it, so probably better than your students.
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I’m not sure anyone could have been worse! It was quite eye-opening! Maybe I’ll take to the streets of Berlin with my “talent” and awe the locals… I had to Google pig latin – shame on me 😉
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Go busking with your coin flipping. Sounds like a money spinner.
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Ha ha, I like what you did there 😉
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