Send me your stories!

After four and a half years here in Germany, I think (hope) I’ve tripped over pretty much every obstacle this crazy, wonderful, bureaucracy-loving land has put in my way. Each time, I picked myself up again, albeit with a muddy face and grazed knees, had a chuckle about the absurdity of it all, and carried on – writing a blog post or two (actually 154 of them) along the way.

Still, I thought, surely there’s a more bump-free way to integrate into German life? (I’m getting contemplative in my old age, you see.) It was around this time that a German colleague approached me with the idea of working on a German-English book together. We toyed with the idea of writing a dual-language storybook but I’m crap at fiction; I find real life is generally much funnier.

So I started thinking about what I would have appreciated when I first moved here, with around four words of the language and a naively optimistic attitude to becoming German. The answer was – a “German in my pocket” – someone who could answer my questions, tell me the right way to say something, and basically just guide me through everything from scaling the wall of bureau-crazy to figuring out which pizza toppings I was ordering. Short of shrinking Germans so people can carry them around with them everywhere, the next best solution seemed to be a book. 

So, we’ve written one!

At the moment, we’re adding the finishing touches, making sure everything is “in Ordnung” legally and financially (in case it actually sells) and then it will be formatting time. We’re hoping to publish at the end of this month – I’m working with a German so this will most likely happen. We’ve got 20 chapters, chock-full of useful information, FAQs, useful vocabulary and (hopefully) some entertaining reading.

Now, obviously I’m hi-larious but I thought a nice way to round out the book would be to add some funny anecdotes from other expats here – you know, to show that we all go through the same stuff and (for the most part) survive. And that’s where you come in.

Anything from the red tape madness to everyday adventures; if it’s funny, I’ll find a way to make it fit. All I need is a paragraph or two and the name you’d like to be credited under – this is your big chance to finally be Tallulah rather than Nora or Doris if that’s what your heart desires.

So please, have a think, take a little time to write a few words, and put them in the comments below. If you’re shy, you can send it to me at – although surely Germany has knocked any shyness out of you by now.

Making me happy should probably be reward enough but, if your story is included, there might be a few giveaways…

(Note: This is all me and totally unapproved by the German partner so don’t take any giveaways as a given.) 

Thanks in advance!



23 thoughts on “Send me your stories!”

  1. Hi Linda!
    You probably don’t remember, but I wrote to you sometime in 2014 because I came across your “Expat eye on Latvia”-blog.
    My message to you resulted in the post “For the love of Latvian men”, to my great amusement.
    I thought it could be cool for you to know how my inquiry to you regarding this man turned out.
    Well, we got married this year and we hope there will be a cute little “ScandiLat” hybrid on the way soon.
    Funny how life works out, huh?
    While he decidedly is Latvian in some ways (read: apparently grumpy), he is still the kindest, most polite, most caring man I have ever met and things are going wonderfully well.
    I hope you have a great life, wherever your path is taking you ❤


    1. Hey there, thanks for getting back in touch! I just reread the “For the love of Latvian men” post – boy, was I harsh haha! I was nearing the end of my time in LV at that stage so I guess that was the build-up of 4 years of frustration 😉 I’m really happy to hear that it’s all working out for you and wish you the best of luck in having ScandiLat Junior! Hopefully he/she won’t inherit the grumpiness 😉 Take care! Linda.


  2. Let me know when it’s published and will you have an ebook option. I’m in the middle of moving from Canada to Germany and would love a little German as you said to help lol. I’ve just started a journal blog with WordPress. That’s how I found you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Tammy, your timing is excellent – we just published a few days ago! Here’s the link to the ebook on Amazon Canada – I’ll have to follow your adventures too – where are you moving to? Best of luck with the move and I hope you enjoy the book! And find it helpful! Keep in touch! Linda 🙂


        1. Ha, yeah, it takes a while to get used to it in the beginning! I’ve just been reading your post on being a German Hausfrau and I think I need a lie-down 😉 Thanks a million for downloading the book and please let me know what you think! If you’re happy with it, a review on Amazon would also be amazing – it looks a little lonely and unloved right now haha! You might also enjoy this documentary – I know I did!


  3. Oh, this is exciting. I’ll be first in line when you publish even though I don’t (as yet) have any plans to visit or move to Germany. But … you never know. Your book might inspire me (or scare the shite out of me … ;)!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Good point. I remember your post about the proper (German) way to break down items for recycling. That had to have been soon after you moved to Berlin, but I think of every time I prepare our boxes for recycling. Even told my husband he doesn’t break down the boxes the right (German) way 😉

        Liked by 1 person

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